Stereotypes abound when it comes to the Bar and Bat Mitzvah hoopla, but the fact is, there's some truth, for some people, to much of it. I thought this invitation wording said it best!
In keeping up with the Rosen's and the Abelson's,
It is with great stress, emotional and physical fatigue,
and incredible financial sacrifice beyond comprehension,
and incredible financial sacrifice beyond comprehension,
that we invite you to join us as our wonderful son
Jacob Adam
is called to the Torah as a Bar Mitzvah.
Saturday, May 12th (yes, we realize it's Mother's Day Weekend)
Jacob Adam
is called to the Torah as a Bar Mitzvah.
Saturday, May 12th (yes, we realize it's Mother's Day Weekend)
Temple Israel
14 Coleytown Road
Westport, Connecticut 06880
at the ungodly hour of 9:00am
at the ungodly hour of 9:00am
even though you don't really need to be there until 10:20am to catch the real action.
If you make it through the three hour service, please skip the kiddush
If you make it through the three hour service, please skip the kiddush
(its just cookies and cake)
and join us instead for an overly large and ostentatious evening meal,
which starts at 7:00pm.
(not 8:00pm, or you will miss out on all the appetizers).
Birchwood Country Club 25 Kings Hwy S. Westport, CT 06880
Birchwood Country Club 25 Kings Hwy S. Westport, CT 06880
(which we had to join just for this event and you would not believe the initiation fees)
You will be in the presence of lots of boisterous and expensive entertainment and 60 to 70 unruly pre-teens wearing expensive dresses, funny hats, fake bling and brand new white ankle socks... as well as 80-100 middle aged+ adults, some balding, some with bad toupees. Most will be professionally coiffed, designer attire galore, lots of REAL bling, and "tootsed" to the nines. At least 1/3 will be hormonally challenged and some will act stupid while under the influence. Some will not even know where or who they are. Some will complain about the food. Blah Blah Blah.
Please have the courtesy of showing up if you RSVP that you are attending, or you will be billed $210.00 a plate if you are a no-show. Please RSVP as soon as you get this and not the day before the cut-off date. I can't take the stress.
The gift of choice is either green, or contains a routing and account number. "Off the top of your head" gifts and Gift Cards are a waste of your time and ours.
Hope you can make it!
Lisa and David Jones
You will be in the presence of lots of boisterous and expensive entertainment and 60 to 70 unruly pre-teens wearing expensive dresses, funny hats, fake bling and brand new white ankle socks... as well as 80-100 middle aged+ adults, some balding, some with bad toupees. Most will be professionally coiffed, designer attire galore, lots of REAL bling, and "tootsed" to the nines. At least 1/3 will be hormonally challenged and some will act stupid while under the influence. Some will not even know where or who they are. Some will complain about the food. Blah Blah Blah.
Please have the courtesy of showing up if you RSVP that you are attending, or you will be billed $210.00 a plate if you are a no-show. Please RSVP as soon as you get this and not the day before the cut-off date. I can't take the stress.
The gift of choice is either green, or contains a routing and account number. "Off the top of your head" gifts and Gift Cards are a waste of your time and ours.
Hope you can make it!
Lisa and David Jones
If you want some real-life suggestions for invitation wording, use the VerseIt link in the sidebar.
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